England Bound

I recently check myself, pre-wrecking myself, and realized I had come down with a bad case of wanderlust.  While I enjoyed my trip to Portland immensely, I felt the need to go somewhere further, maybe more exotic.  I need somewhere where they don’t speak English, or at least sound funny when they do it. 

England should do the trick.  I mean, have you ever seen Little Britain?  Those accents are wacky! 

What my research shows me average English people are like.


So using no small portion of my charm, I convinced Gilly she should put up with me for a week.  She has a poor long-term memory, and hasn’t read this blog where I mock the English yet, so I’m golden.  Hopefully, if she does read this when I’m there, she doesn’t kick me out.  I probably shouldn’t antagonize her, because some longtime readers will remember Gimtmbifhbsic.

It shouldn’t be a problem.  I’ve played a lot of video games.  A large portion of them take place in worlds where everyone fights with swords and a windmill is the height of technology.  In those games, everyone speaks with an English accent.  Based on this wealth of research, I’m forced to conclude that people who speak with English accents are technologically inept, and electricity hasn’t been invented in England yet.

The same research shows that the Scottish are dwarves.


The internet doesn’t work well without electricity, and without knowing when I’ll have access, I can’t ensure my blog schedule will be met. 

But you, dear reader, you need me.  You need something to read in a little window on the corner of your desktop when you’re supposed to be filling out TPS reports. 

With cover sheets, of course.


WordPress to the rescue!  Using their pre-publish feature, I’ve set it up so it will be like I wasn’t gone.  In fact, if you’re reading this, I’ve already been in England for two days. 

Updates will go up as regular, but it’ll be mostly backlog ideas, and more restaurant reviews than normal. If you leave a comment, I won’t be getting back to with my usual lightening speed, because I’ll be doing English things. 

Research suggests it'll probably be things like this.


Then I’ll come back with all kinds of amazing England stories. 

Unless a Dragon eats me. 

… or if Gilly reads this…